So I found this link to “tear-free” bridesmaid dresses. Presumably ones that are so awesome, your bridesmaids would feel gorgeous and want to wear them again and again.
Except the first
featherduster dress, I’m sure, will have you sneezing up a storm with its featherlicious structure. Weddings are supposed to be happy occasions. I’m sure that ostrich that gave its life for your dress is smiling down on you from animal heaven as it shivers, naked.
(Ok I totally falsified that. Apparently ostriches shed their feathers).
If the hayfever doesn’t make you all puffy and red eyed, the price tags will. What bridesmaid in their right mind would let their bridezilla friend force them to drop nearly $1,000 on a dress? And here I am thinking I’ll just take the girls to David’s Bridal where they can walk out with a cheap dress the same day and not have to deal with the mess of measurements and six month wait times (like my wedding dress).
But I’m sure they’d be much less “teary eyed” over the Moulin Rouge Can Can girl’s headdress you can always wrap around you like a towel. For $725. Just don’t forget to load up on anti-histamine to avoid that black mascara line running down your face. Works for Alice Cooper, not so much for you.
Some feather dresss are ok, this one isn’t.