How grooms can cope with a bride-centric industry

22 Feb

Remember phonebooks? This wedding magazine is just as thick. 624 pages, and about 75% wedding dress ads. Grooms need a better way.

The second installment in a series of guest posts from fiance’s complaints about the wedding industry.

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Here’s my two cents…well maybe four cents because I’m sure there was a two cent rant in the preceding post. Guys can’t win. Everything is targeted against the guy.

First you do the right thing and give her a nice ring that probably cost you more than you should have spent, but it’s okay because you love her. You don’t want to be a deadbeat fiance and you want to have at least some say in your wedding, especially if you are paying for it. But you can’t, because everything is bride this, bride that. You can’t even go into the wedding dress store because you’re a guy and there’s signs saying you’re not allowed inside.

Imagine if girls weren’t allowed into Radio Shack. It would be smack on the front of CNN, and women would be protesting in front of the store before you have time to refresh this page. But for some reason its ok to do this to dudes. In-fact let’s just make events and venues where the grooms can’t go. After all, they think what guy would want to take part in planning a wedding…just give the fiancee all your money and let her spend it at the wedding show, that you have to pay to get into, but she doesn’t. (This was in the above-linked post).

So my advice guys: be as supportive as you can, and if at any point you get the “why do I have to do all of this by myself” speech from her, just comfort her, and say you are doing the best you can, but the industry just isn’t guy friendly when it comes to weddings, and ask her if there is something you could do that doesn’t involve the word “bride.”

In fact there should be a simple magazine or book, say not more than 10 pages, with no wedding dress ads, or stories about some famous person with a million dollar wedding budget having grilled cheese butlers (definition: a grilled cheese butler is one who walks around your wedding guests at around midnight with a platter of grilled cheese sandwiches cut in finger food sizes, and with little cups of dijon ketchup for dipping. I’m looking at you Chelsea Clinton). The magazines should have no honeymoon articles on how you can go hang gliding on the moon (despite there being no air to lift the glider).

No, just a simple book with real world examples of what guys are supposed to do, and say, so that the bride-to-be doesn’t think they don’t care, but also so they don’t constantly butt heads against the unfair, sexist, and biased wedding industry….stay tuned for my next guest post, where I’ll talk about how to tie a noose…I mean…why do I have to fill out more paperwork to sign up for a gift registry than buying a car…and why is the registry lady so disgusted that I have five laundry baskets.

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